the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
