he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
