Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
