Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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