"it" just moved
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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