why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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