I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
