Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I have aggressive nipples.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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