when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
