In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
