remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
