Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
