You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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