I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
