i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I think your dad took our porno
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
