this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
