And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize