I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
