I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
this boner is exhausting
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Randomize
