turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
