Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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