This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
