i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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