Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
