We're facebook friends in real life
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
