Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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