arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
