That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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