Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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