Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
