i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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