I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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