spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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