Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
