Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
