I accidentally had phone sex last night
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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