So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize