proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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