Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
