the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
