My balls are so social today.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
