Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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