She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
