batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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