I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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