Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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