spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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