Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
