Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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