Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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