HIV tests are more positive than that guy
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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